Intimacy in a pandemic. How one couple thrived
“I wasn’t sure if I’d still want to be with Logan after being cooped up together for a long time, but the opposite is true. We both made a real effort to keep our relationship sexy and fun,” says Steph, a 28-year-old real estate agent from Melbourne.
Steph met Logan, who works as an account manager for a media organisation and just turned 30, at her best friend Lisa’s birthday party 2 years ago. Since that first encounter and the steamy night that followed, they’ve spent nearly every weekend and most early mornings together.
They’re both outgoing, sporty, and full of energy. Before the coronavirus restrictions were enforced, they’d hit the gym together at 6.00am 5 days a week, go to their favourite lunch bars and restaurants, or leave the beaten city paths to enjoy bush walks and ocean swims. They had their own apartments but spent most nights together.
When a state of emergency was declared in March, the couple decided to move into Logan’s place, as it wasn’t clear to anyone what would happen next, and they’d otherwise have to travel across the city to be with each other.
We spoke to Steph on November 12, after the 112-day lockdown was over and life had returned to semi-normal for Melburnians. We asked her what life was like living with her boyfriend in confinement, and if it had improved or disconnected their sex life and relationship.
We’re happy to report that Steph and Logan are still going strong, and that they’ve both learned a thing or two on how to keep their love life spicy and exciting.
“At first, we were mostly worried about friends and family. How bad was this situation, really? Logan’s grandparents are old and vulnerable, and my little sister has asthma so we were worried the virus would have serious consequences for them. Luckily, they are all still safe and healthy,” Steph says.
“Spending 24/7 together was no issue at first. We had long sleep-ins, hot sex in the afternoon, and we thought that trips to the supermarket would be our new social outing. It wasn’t quite like that, but we splashed out on fancy cheese and fine-cut meats those first weeks, just because we could.” she laughs.
“But after a few weeks, it became a bit of a drag. I turned to my vibrator more than reaching out for Logan’s cock,” she admits.
“We both really missed our workouts at the gym and doing what we normally do. Working from home was also a challenge. The apartment is big enough and there’s plenty of space for each of us, but quarantine is tough no matter what.”
Boredom set it, and Steph says is started to feel a bit like Groundhog Day.
Then one Monday morning, a parcel arrived on their doorstep addressed to Steph. She hadn’t ordered anything, so she was curious and excited to find out what was in it.
It was a little white device, promising air pulse technology and intense vibration for a whole new sensation and a whole new orgasm.
“Now that was something I didn’t expect,” says Steph.
“Logan was in the shower when it arrived, and I thought about taking it to the bedroom and giving it a try by myself, but then I realised he must have sent it. So I got out of my sweatpants and tank top, and joined him in the bathroom with my new little toy in hand.”
They had mind blowing sex in the shower, and Steph says they both had a huge smile on their face that stayed there for the rest of the day. Not a word was said about where the parcel had come from, or who the mastermind was behind the online order.
A few weeks later, another parcel arrived.
This one held a stainless steel sex toy called The Arch, and no time was wasted. Steph said she has never experienced a G-spot massage just like it, and it is now her favourite thing to play with.
“It was so thoughtful that Logan didn’t order just any cheap sex toy. He knows how important quality is to me. I really don’t like anything tacky,” she says.
“He did his research and found products that were right for me, well made, safe, body-friendly and a cool design. Of course it was meant for his fun as much as my own, but it shows me that he really cares.”
Steph and Logan found a way to beat the boredom during lockdown by introducing sex toys to their love life, including cheeky anal beads they both enjoyed and a prostate vibrator that brought Logan a sensation he didn’t know was possible. Steph ordered that one, in week 6.
They still have their own individual masturbation habits, but quarantine has given them an exciting opportunity to try new things and new toys for pleasure together. Steph reckons it has been a great way to shake things up and take the pressure off, and she is loving the multiple orgasms.
“Even when we’re having our regular sex without using any of the toys, I feel closer to Logan now than I did before,” she says.
Steph and Logan are certainly not the only couple that has have been entertaining and enjoying themselves and each other while self-isolating. Globally, online retailers have seen a huge spike in lingerie and pleasure items sales.
Massage oils, vibrators, bondage gear and even erotic colouring books are more popular than ever.
In recent years, the emphasis has shifted from seedy to luxury, and it’s all about treating yourself. Social acceptance and openness around sex is okay, particularly amongst women.
The quality of vibrators and other sex toys has greatly improved, and they are now stocked by high-end lifestyle brands that promote sexual wellness, self-love, and body safe pleasure.
You may like to see the toys mentioned in this article.